Quick hits: Never Grow Up Edition

-I'm going to be 27 years old on Thursday, and I just spent $20 ordering this. Props to K-Rock for finding this on the internets, and for being the only person, once the item was found, to order it before me. TheGirl's reaction: "Please tell me you're kidding." I'm not proud of my immaturity. I don't hide it either.

-The Cubs have shown signs of improvement on offense and defense, and have won 3 in a row for the first time since April 23-25. I am rewarding them by attending tonight's game versus Andy Pettitte and the Astros.

-Dolph and I are throwing a joint birthday party on Saturday to celebrate our 27th year on this planet that will include this, this, and a journey downtown to see these guys. Birthdays are fun, but I actually prefer other people's birthdays to my own...probably because I like reasons to celebrate, and celebration itself, but not all the attention. Sharing parties is therefore a good idea for me. Happy birthday, Dolph.

- Get Well Soon, Big Ben. But once you are completely recovered, I'd like to slap you in your newly-repaired head. The fact that this guy is a 24-year old Super Bowl Champion quarterback with a limitless future, and still chooses to ride racing bikes without a helmet, after being repeatedly told by many not to do so, tells me that he should have that head examined while it's getting stitched up. You did a stupid thing, Ben. You were lucky. Don't do it again. And stop saying on national television that you don't think riding without a helmet is risky. In fact, you may have just annointed yourself the new national spokesman for helmet safety.

-Memo to USA Soccer: if you're trying to get the sports-loving public in America to be interested and supportive of your sport, embarrassing yourselves on a world stage isn't the way to do it. After looking anemic and timid in a 3-0 loss to the Czech Republic, there is only one (semi-realistic) option: beat Ghana, draw Italy, and pray to whomever you pray to that 4 points gets you out of pool play. With the goal differential already favoring the Italians, however, even this scenario probably spells doom for the Americans.

Man, it's perfect weather in Chicago this week. Get out there and use it.